Bubbles rising to the surface 9:49
Loving myself
learning to love myself
living and loving myself
has been a brutal war
half way between I’wont be able to go like this anymore
and of course I will , this is what i was came for
learning to love myself has been nonetheless a brewing war
knees wet from trails on the carpet floor
Im in deep this time
still expected to explore
& now
I am asking of more of myself than ever before
screams come from someplace deep I am untaming the beast inside of me I cut the rope from her ankles off her feet and let her come up to see
soothing her arrival immeadiatly with the words “ you’re not an anchored ache you’re a blessing”
expecting to soothe her she soothes me
“you have not sunken you were just sleep
I was keeping you floating while you were sleep
twelve years under sea you were surrounded by people waiting to call defeat
I kept you floating walking across the bottom of the sea
the ropes tied to my feet was to keep you travelling with me
she replies
I see, this is all so much more than a ‘bad dream’
a- and my screams placed taking residence of where my head should lay
to anyone who doesnt have the eyes for calamity
this looks like insanity
but
I am getting empty a stomach full of peace
I could’ve choose anger
anything
and still I choose peace
mold me over
time and time again
rid me of all impurities , strip me off of all superiority, remind me that I am a dreamer and a lover to the core. A solider of love
prepared to experience more
the descent left me battered and bruised not knowing who to look to.
leaving deaths grips just in time so many times
anyone else’s mouths would read Good God why have you for saken me
even on the kitchen floor with a knife
just escaping my assaulters eyes
in him and in me
that was not easy
I will always give thanks for the gift to see
I know everyone
anyone
who would say why have you forgotten of me
I used to say to friends coming up that it was supposed to be this way something that I needed to learn
beat me till I’ll black and blue I’ll still find truth in you
Tragedy
a series of catostrophes that lead me to my higher me.
Ultimately.
It was all it was meant to be.
I could’ve chose to feel anything
and I chose peace
In the middle of a war zone
I chose peace
The path of complete compassion and yet I know there is still a rager in me
who wants to live out the fantasy of standing on her enemies and calling out
‘defeat’
just like they did me
when I was sleep
but overall all i’ve ever wanted was peace
If we have to go to the end of the worlds just for us to meet
then so it shall be
theres nothing left but to call that magic
it fathoms me
how you walk out of burning buildings with never a scratch to see
Just in time
secret agent sundu gaining wisdom with every mssion she grew through
walking through the flames and rising in the floods
appearing from the rubble
her time has just begun
theres nothing left than to call this magic
how can someone from such tummult walk out with grace
its fathoms me
takes my breath away
